Understanding and Compassion
Try not to speak from reflex. When it's clear you are in the midst of conflict...before you talk, be mindful of your breath. Take a second and just put your attention toward your breath (feel it deep in your belly). Take how ever many deep mindful breaths it takes, in order for you to seek first to understand...yourself, others, the situation at hand. Just slow down and seek first to understand before you start talking. It can help most situations.
Check out new Thich Nhat Hanh in Points 2 Ponder
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